i'm here.
i think i'm going to take a short short break for awhile. yeah, it's one of those, but this time, i don't have a particular reason. (did i ever?) but let's see... what has happened since my last decent post? hmm.. let me try to list things in short.

i drink about a 1L of water/day. (yeah, i'm learning about renal in physiology. :T)

one dent in the front bumper of my car. one in the rear. (too painful for me to talk about)

went to a formal. my 'date' said i was the best date ever!

i skipped half of my classes since last exam. remember how ecstatic i was at starting classes an hour late? well.. it also meant sleeping in. like really sleeping in. :P

decided to go to kansas city during spring break.. yup, regretting this very much. anyone else interested?

have a pseudo-idea of what i want to be when i grow up

i think that's it! many pictures to post but for later. (with my primitive skills and limited software, it takes too much time- to resize, change resolutions.. etc.)

it's friday!!! lots of work await me. i might see Passion. i remember the days when i had a HUGE cruch on mel gibson. when informed that he's married with many kids, i decided to go for his older son with same blue/green eyes. this might have been the post-'i want to marry prince william' era. *sigh*

good night and have a good week!

where is amy???

wowsers..

(yeah, i just said wowsers.. :) so exams ended. i don't know how i did on half of them because the fire alarm went off during self-grade. (and to think that it could have gone off half an hour earlier...), but it's done. and a minute ago, i got an email that we are on a 9am schedule until march. oh my... can this be real? an extra hour to sleep!

person A and person B talking in the computer lab saying,
A: "so how's amy doing? is she a gunner?"
B: "well.. she tries. but it doesn't really work. she tried sitting in the front row but she said she kept falling asleep so she's back to her former seat in the back."

___
alrighty, more to come later. wait until you hear about my yesterday. and lastly, thanks guys for the encouragements, good lucks.. i was very happy to see them when i got home last night.

need to do some good things to myself because i've neglected myself for too long. some quality time with self is in need. laters!

today my stress level sky-rocketed beyond measure...
so high that i wanted to throw in the towel and say, 'stress, you win. i lose.'
then on my walk to my car from campus, in the dark, alone and very cold, i reasoned.

'it's only a test.
even if i fail, i'll still be in school.
even if i get kicked out of school, i'll have a place to go.
my family will still be there. my friends are still willing me accept me as a friend.
i'll find a job. i'll have a new life.

if all fails, i'll find a great husband.'

i can't say if it's the cold air or my chain of thoughts,
but i feel 100% better.

:) wish me luck.

the most insightful thinking from today :

my life would radically change if i had photographic memory.

whoa....
my brain's slowly turning into a mush. having ramen near midnight didn't help me think more clearly so i basically consumed 400 calories for nothing. oh what a cruel world...

dear you,



from me.

just had some fresh-baked sugar cookies. that would be fresh home baked cookies, y'all.

i feel terrible for eating a cookie after midnight. especially when one cookie has triple-digit calories. but it was necessary in my continual pursuit of satisfaction.

guys, i'm stressed. that's why i'm blogging and reading other blogs and suppressing the thought of work.

i want bubble tea.
now.

there are some things that i just don't understand in life.
missing socks would be one of the many.

i'm quite certain that i come home with both my feet wearing the same socks i wore in the morning. i really don't recall coming home with just one. my memory isn't that bad...

then, how do you explain the missing socks i have every time i try to match them after laundry? the only possible i can come up with is that the washer and dryers have a hidden appetite for socks.

but they are doing an impeccable job of pleading their innocence.

it's harder for me to write things that are closer to the 'core' now that many more of you know me as a friend, a classmate, even as a teacher (hi j!:) and have seen me outside this window. but i must do what i feel ought to do... and that is to share. as i literally cut and paste the next few paragraphs from what was written for my own record, please take it as a request for prayer if you're a believer, or read it over as a deeper look into me and that which has been consuming my thoughts as of late. and those of you who's been following up with these blogs know that this may disappear when i wake up one morning and say, 'why in the world did i do that for?"
blogger and i have a true love-and-hate relationship.

* * *
(written after tonight's dinner hosted by medical doctor christians.)

I’ve been compromising much more than I knew.

somone said to change “from being successful to being significant…” quoting howard hendericks.

I was too focused on being successful which appears to be an admirable pursuit -- even from a christian perspective --that I neglected to “seek first His kingdom and his righteousness.” Something He desires in me that I’ve been putting in the back burner. What a trembling thought that is… His will in the back burners of my life.

My verse, Galatians 2:20, flashed before me during prayer and gave chills down my spine. “… the life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God” Living by faith… it certainly is by faith in Christ that I live. and live with hope. But do I live this life to God to the extent that I am called. Romans 6:8 says “Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him... the life he lives, he lives to God.” And the second part of the Galatians verse pains me all the more, “.. Christ who loves me and gave himself for me.” who is so worthless.

“Whoever tries to keep his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life will preserve it.” Luke 17.

Lack of trust makes it so hard for me to lose the life that I hold in my hands. It’s that story I once heard, of a young girl with a toy pearl necklace that her daddy asked to give him. She clenched it so tightly and could not let go, when all along, her father had a string of real beautiful pearls in his hands to give in return. Fully knowing that He cares for that life more than I can ever do for myself, it's still so hard.

I was well in my way to becoming choked by the “thorns” – "by the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth." I want to be fruitful, bearing fruit 100x, 60x, 30 times… and be significant.
* * *

heart-broken.
lost all my emails from my previous outlook.
no outlook to use.

can't talk right now.

i just got a new office xp and found that it incluces 'frontpage.'
all i have to say is

uh oh...

so i've had my cellphone for months now and the same goes with my printer. but it's only this morning that i find all these cool features they were equipped with. my phone has a radio! and i'm listening to npr as i speak... which turns off during incoming/outgoing calls. whoa... and the printer has a scanner that can scan pictures.

am i just really outdated?

random things i find to do in the morning. just don't tell mom that i skipped school today.

hey you, who have a birthday coming up this weekend,
since you know me well, you were probably expecting a phonecall or a card a few months down the line with my usual saying, 'well, i finally got around to sending that letter...' but this year, i really tried to be good. i really did. i wanted to give you my best wishes on time..

but please excuse the tardiness once again. and please blame it on the postoffice that wouldn't except my mail, and another one that was not where it is suppose to be according to mapquest, and finally another one whose sole worker closed down the office for two hours for his lunch break. i really tried, even parking my car at a tow-away zone *twice.*

and here it is..
happy 26th birthday, dj!
(haha, your initials are dj :D okay, i'll be quiet...)

yes, a bit early but better early then late, right?
_______
and as for our mutual friend that we have in boston, dude, i missed her birthday too! and i even put a reminder on my phone for that.. me and dates just don't get along. oh pooey...

01.02.04 : dinner with a group of very loud people.

my sister and i vowed never to eat in public with them after that night.

can you tell that i'm posting a random picture to make up for the lack of writing here? :) today marks my second visit to the gym, which would mean that this week marks the first time i ever went to a gym twice in one week. whoa.... and if i stick with my promise to my roommate to go swimming again tomorrow, oh my.. i don't think i can handle such drastic change in my life!

good night y'all.
____
one of the worst feelings in the world is catching yourself waking up from a sleep you didn't know you had. pray that tomorrow will be a better study day.

guess where i was at an hour ago --
the swimming pool!

the last time i actually went to a pool for the sole purpose to swim was in 9th grade PE class.

oh the horror...

anyways, just saying hi.. i started another private blog with a few people from maryland this and it's been taking up the precious 'blog time' of the day. and this short entry must suffice for my own.

ah... so much catching up to do. my first-hand experience of snowballing power of school work.